Life Skills and Empowerment Strategies

Breathe PEACE! Follow Up

2011-06-27T09:03:00.000-07:00

My heartfelt thanks to everyone who participated online and offline, in the Breathe PEACE! event yesterday.

I am absolutely overjoyed by the response and the huge number of people I received emails from regarding my efforts to generate more Peace in this world. Clearly this was needed and so, as a result of all of you stepping up and making use of the space I created, I will be organizing this event again.While I have not chosen a date as yet, it will most likely be in the next couple of months giving me enough time to make more Peace connections.

I learned a lot from this experience and will be making some changes as to how I go about things next time making it easier for people to participate and getting more people involved.

Until then, Breathe PEACE!

My deepest thanks to you,

Kristina Jansz

Breathe PEACE

2011-06-20T09:05:00.000-07:00

Will you join me this Sunday, June 26th, 2011 for 10 minutes in the online Breathing Room to breathe Peace around the world?

To get a sense of how the Breathing Room works it would be a good idea to visit the website a day or two before hand and become comfortable with it. One of the wonderful things about this site is that we can see where around the world the others are who are breathing with us.

Here’s how it will work:

1. At 8:55am EST /Toronto time (or earlier if you’d like more time), sit and quiet your energy

2. At 9:00am EST enter the online Breathing Room. Here is the link: http://doasone.com/BreathingRooms.aspx?RoomID=1

3. In the lower left hand corner click on the ‘Universal Breathing Room’. In the right hand corner click on ‘Intentionalize’ and choose the intention, PEACE.

4. From 9:00am EST to 9:10am EST focus your intention on PEACE while you breathe. Draw the energy of Peace into you with each inhalation and with each exhalation send it out to the world

My intention will be that every being on our planet Earth; every child, woman and man, every leader, healer, convict and abuser, each and every heart that feels alone, lost and frightened, every plant, animal, droplet of water and the Earth herself, will experience an indescribable fullness of Peace and that within this experience of Peace, healing will take place, healing that will allow us to live in a more compassionate, loving and peaceful world.

5. There is power in numbers so while you are breathing your focused Intention, feel the energy of being joined together with others around the world who are doing this at the some time.

I very aware that for some of you participating in this, it will mean that you have to get up extremely early and to you my heart is filled with such great gratitude for this extra effort.

Thank you so very much and I’ll be with you in the Breathing Room this Sunday at 9:00am EST/ Toronto time,

Namaste!
Kristina Jansz

The Anatomy of a Highly Effective Apology

2010-11-22T06:51:00.000-08:00

I can't even begin to count how many times people have told me that someone has said 'Sorry' to them without knowing what they were apologizing for. Not only is the apology ineffective, it increases the amount of resentment in the one who was wronged leading to a deeper level of hurt and distrust.

If your intent to apologize is sincere, do it correctly!

Here is the anatomy of a sincere and effective apology:

1. Acknowledge / describe what you did that was hurtful.

2. Acknowledge / describe the pain, suffering and damage that your actions inflicted on the other.

3. Sincerely (speak from your heart) apologize for what you did and the pain it has caused.

4. Describe what you have learned from the experience and your goals for changing your behavior so that this will never happen again.

5. Acknowledge that you understand 'talk is cheap' and that it will be your behavior not your words which, over time, will earn back the trust of the other.
6. Pay special attention to HOW you deliver the message: tone and volume of voice, facial expressions, body language and attitude. Remember: how you deliver the message is part of the message itself.

Following this, give the person you're apologizing to time to absorb what you have said and perhaps even ask some questions. Keep in mind that just because you're ready to apologize, it doesn't mean the other person is ready to hear it.

Try not to get on the defensive when questions are asked and note that when the hurt has gone very deep, you will most likely have to repeat these steps a few times. If the relationship is truly important to you, you will have no doubts about doing this.

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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You miss 100% of the shots you don't take

2010-11-13T03:04:00.000-08:00

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take" -Wayne Gretzky

It's okay if you don't succeed or do things perfectly every time you try something new. In fact, no one succeeds at everything the first time.

Attempting something, making mistakes, evaluating, making changes to what you did and trying again (and then repeating this process over and over again) is just part of the process.

The greatest setback in your life will not be if you fail, it will be if you don't try at all.

So, let this be the day that you step out of your comfort zone and strive for something greater. If you need training to prepare for it, reach out and get it. If you need some moral support, ask for it, just make sure you try! :)

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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Teen and Young Adult Depression

2010-09-28T02:28:00.000-07:00

Here is a fantastic site for teens and young adults dealing with depression and suicidal thoughts. Please forward this link on to others. You could be saving a life!
www.copingvsmoping.com.

Of all the lies you were ever told

2010-07-30T04:43:00.000-07:00

Of all the lies you were ever told, the worst, and by far the most damaging, is the one that led you to believe that you are not good enough.

This could never be true. That you have lessons to learn, yes. That you have made mistakes and hurt others, yes again, in fact who can honestly say they haven't, but that you are, at the most fundamental level of your being 'not good enough', no.

To those who told you this, say:

"No thank you. I don't accept what you're saying to be true. If there are lessons to learn, I will learn them. If there are changes I need to make in myself, I will make them but I choose to do so from a place of Power and not from being diminished and devalued as a human being."

And then, from this place of Power show compassion because it is only someone so deeply wounded who could find it useful to hurt another in this way.

Don't pass the pain on. Be the courageous agent of change who stands up and says, it stops here, it stops with me.

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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The Emotional Detox Diet: Consume less, Give more

2010-07-22T06:29:00.000-07:00

Over the years you have, no doubt, heard of many diets and wellness plans for optimal health.

When distilled to their core elements, most of them speak of consuming fewer bad foods, eating more healthy foods, drinking lots of water to flush out toxins and stay hydrated, supplementing with vitamins and other nutritional supports to fortify your body and of course, being more physically active to burn of the unwanted pounds.

Well, how about using this model for optimal Emotional health? As I see it, the Emotional Detox and Wellness Diet would look something like this:

1. Consume less: anger, impatience, resentment, judgment, fear, apathy, addictive behaviours and negative thoughts

2. Give more: consideration, tolerance, understanding, support, encouragement, forgiveness, compassion and Love

3. Cleanse and Hydrate your emotional body by thinking thoughts that fill you with Hope, Joy and Inspiration

4. Fortify your life by surrounding yourself with positive, uplifting people and a loving, encouraging support system

5. Burn off old, toxic emotional energy by doing things that make you glad to be alive, bring a smile to someone's face and make a positive difference in the world.

Seriously, shouldn't we all be on an Emotional Detox and Wellness Diet? :)

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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Slow down!

2010-07-13T05:29:00.000-07:00

Prolonged stress does unbelievable damage to your life, so in the best interest of your physical, mental and emotional health....slow down!

Here is a great link that will give you practical ways to slow down your very busy and demanding life. If you're unable to click on it, cut and paste it into your browser.

http://brightdays.wordpress.com/2007/12/03/12-tips-to-help-you-slow-down-and-relax/

Remember, the key to making long lasting change is to do one new thing consistently and repeatedly over time and you'll soon find that it feels like a normal way of living. So just start with one tip at a time, do it until you master it, then move on to the next one.

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/strongsteps

Darkness cannot remain dark in the presence of Light

2010-07-10T03:16:00.000-07:00

It is precisely into those areas that keep us from our greatness, that we must step.

Being diminished through control, bullying, manipulation and deceit as well as our self-generated shadows of lies, resentment, apathy, addiction etc. lessens the integrity with which we live life, wounds the truth of who we are and asks that we settle for less.

And this is exactly what we must not do, for each time we allow ourselves to 'turn a blind eye', let things slide or be beaten down, we give more of our power away.

Darkness cannot remain dark in the presence of Light. When we summon up the courage to face the things that control us, they lose power over us and we reclaim our Dignity.

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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Seek first to Understand

2010-07-09T03:40:00.000-07:00

Have you noticed how Reactive you are? We all are. Before the person we're speaking with has even finished what they're saying, we've already decided what our opinion is on the matter. The opportunity for misunderstanding is so great that it's a wonder we communicate at all!

I believe a sign of intelligence, not to mention evolution, is to make sure we have as much information and have understood the other as much as possible, before responding.

So today, why not make it your priority to first understand the other. Truly listen, ask questions, clarify what you've heard and when you're sure you've thoroughly understood what was intended, then respond. You'll find that this:

1. Greatly reduces misunderstandings
2. Fulfills one of our most basic needs as human beings, which is to be heard
3. Creates a climate of communication where even if the other disagrees with your opinion, they are more likely to be open to what you have to say because they feel their thoughts were received respectfully.
4. Increases the quality of communication tremendously

Share your experiences of doing this by posting a comment!

For more morsels of Inspiration, be sure to follow me on Twitter:
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The Power to create Change

2010-07-08T06:06:00.000-07:00

At any given instant you are both the individual droplet of water in the ocean and the Ocean itself.

What I mean by this is that you are an individual being, complete with your joys, sorrows, courage, fears and gifts and at the same time, you are a vital part of the Whole: family, community, town, country and Humanity itself. And there in lies your power to be an extraordinary agent of change.

At the microscopic level, when that tiny droplet of water raises its frequency by cleansing the pollutants it has been carrying and purifies itself, the quality of the Whole at the macro level is positively affected.

We are often overwhelmed by the issues that are taking place in the world around us; oil spills, natural disasters, wars etc., and to find a way to make a difference when our own lives are so demanding, can be daunting.

But this little analogy of the water droplet illustrates how you can, in fact, make powerful changes.

Start with yourself! Turn your eyes inwards and locate an area of your thoughts,feelings and behaviors that are heavy and non-productive, then make it your focus to think, feel and do differently on that one issue. It won't happen instantly but keep at it and it will change, you will change and therefore, so will the world around you.

This, I believe, is what Gandhi meant when he said "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." He profoundly understood the power of One.

Now imagine what would happen if many, many 'droplets' did this :)

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Joy is a Choice

2010-05-04T10:27:00.000-07:00

Recently, some children said to me "You're always happy" and this got me thinking.....

During the past 4 years of my life I have lost 7 loved ones, not acquaintances, but those who I held close to my heart. In what can only be described as a shock of seismic proportion, a huge part of the loving, emotional landscape of my life disappeared.

I didn't know my heart could withstand so much loss and still survive. Even more surprising to me was that while I was experiencing the tremendous grief of losing one loved one after another, deep inside, behind the heartbreak, I could still sense the Joy (albeit faint) that I have come to know as my essential nature.

Don't get me wrong, I have cried more tears than I knew I had. When driving I would often have to pull my car over to the side of the road because I couldn't see clearly for all the tears in my eyes. Sometimes the pain was so intense, it was all I could do to breathe into the next moment. Still, there was never a doubt that the part of me I nourish, cherish, support and protect was intact and the only thing greater than the profound grief I was experiencing was the profound sense of certainty that the love, joy and strength within me was greater than the pain. Knowing this, I could surrender to the grief allowing myself to feel it, know it and be with it until it shifted, something essential to the healing process.

How did I have this within me? I developed it. It has been an unwavering choice, followed by behaviour I have aligned with this choice, practiced everyday.

I choose Joy. I could have chosen anything: despair, bitterness, anger, powerlessness etc. and in aligning my behaviors with any of these, my life would be a reflection of those choices. However, I decided to choose Joy and to see and experience it in all its forms even when the people and events around me seem to indicate the opposite. This is my right as a human being and it is yours, too.

This is also an incredibly powerful place from which to live because you will not be solely dependent upon things outside of yourself to make you feel good, happy, safe or joyous.

Stay tuned for the continuation of this thought in my next blog. Thanks for visiting!

Is Your Hunger Greater Than Your Fears? Part 3

2009-12-20T17:43:00.000-08:00

Using discomfort to your advantage

In our society we are conditioned to expect comfort, fulfillment and pleasure, now and at all times. Day or night, if we need cash we can go to a machine, punch in some numbers and money comes out. If we’re hungry but either too busy or simply can’t be bothered to buy groceries and prepare a meal, we drive up to a box, speak into it and *presto*, food appears through a window.

Having been nurtured in these excessively cushioned environments where we expect the immediate and continued fulfillment of our needs, we’re often shocked find ourselves totally unprepared for Reality and the essential role that ‘discomfort’ plays in the growth and development of our total being.

To be clear, what I’m speaking of here is different from the kind of momentary flare ups of being upset with something that has occurred in a given day or week. These are the types of things that frustrate us but not to the extent where we feel we’re at a breaking point and have to take drastic action.

Within the context I’ve outlined in the past 2 blogs, experiencing prolonged discomfort is very important information. Long-term anger, resentment, bitterness, stress, depression, anxiety and hopelessness signals that you have outgrown your comfort zone and now have an evolutionary decision to make in just the same way as the bird who had outgrown its shell. It is a sign that as a natural, evolving being you are ready to go to the next and extraordinary stage of your development.

However, in a social climate that tells us we’re supposed to feel good all the time, and if we don’t there’s something wrong with us, we might not recognize Discomfort as a sign that a great evolutionary step is getting ready to take place, in much the same way as labour pains precede bringing a new life into the world.

In fact, precisely because we have been conditioned to expect comfort as a way of life, these signs are often considered an aberration of the collective norm and are silenced with the use/abuse of antidepressants, alcohol, drugs and the many forms of ‘soft’ addictions that distract us from our discomfort.

Instead of numbing ourselves to the flashing signs signaling a time of growth, it would be infinitely more supportive and beneficial to our personal evolution if we’d recognize them for what they are, step up to the plate and get focused, prepared and excited about entering our next stage of evolution.

There will be some uncertainty
Taking those first steps out of our predictable world of familiar beliefs, behaviours and connections, and stepping into the unknown can be very disorienting. Our fears get triggered, we panic and are filled with racing thoughts of turning back and calling the whole evolution thing off! But understand that these feelings of stress and disorientation are not an indication of failure but are, in fact, a defining characteristic of taking this great step.

Think about it, when that little bird first poked its head out of the shell and was shocked at the strange world staring back, do you think it didn't have a strong urge to pick up the bits of shell and patch up the hole?

So, what’s important to know is that there will be moments when you will feel very uncertain and want to turn back. It’s just a natural part of the process but this is the time when you need to get very clear and focused on your goal, have a great plan, a strong support system and with every ounce of your being, want to get to your destination. Your hunger for it has to be greater that your fears.

The reason why you must risk going forward and break free of the emotional undertow that tries to pull you back to your former, and now ineffective comfort zone, is because this is the only way you can grow to your full potential, experience a deeply fulfilling life and realize your life’s purpose.

Great Links to Help You Live an Empowered Life

Emotional Intelligence
"Many experts now feel that EQ is a better predictor of success than traditional IQ tests. See how you stack up with the Emotional Intelligence Test."
http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_page/index.htm?idRegTest=1121

www.kristinajansz.com

Is Your Hunger Greater Than Your Fears? Part 2

2009-12-12T15:35:00.000-08:00

What was once your Protection, is now a Prison

Imagine a little bird developing inside a shell. Without its shell the bird would be exposed to predators and turbulent weather and it wouldn’t survive so, it’s clear that the purpose of the shell is to provide protection that is essential to its growth and survival. Day after day, oblivious to what is taking place on the outside or the fact that there even is an ‘outside’, the bird exists safely within its spherical world.

Now, because the bird is a living being, it is also growing and after a while it starts getting uncomfortable inside. Increasingly, there is less and less room to move. At first it’s just a feeling of mild discomfort and the bird shifts this way and that trying to find a comfortable position however, with each day that goes by, it becomes more cramped inside and eventually the point comes where its very survival is at risk.

Finally, it just can’t take it any more! What was once its protection has now become its prison and if the little bird stays within the egg it will definitely perish. Here, the bird finds itself at a critical juncture and has an evolutionary decision to make: 1.Remain within the egg, the only world it has ever known and in doing so, die or 2. Do something that goes against every protective instinct it has ever had to date, this being, to peck through the walls which up until now have defined its world and ensured its safety.

In order to survive and evolve, its hunger for survival has to be greater than its fear of the unknown. The bird has to leave what was once its comfort zone and take flight to realize its destiny as a bird.

What all of this means to you

Now let’s talk about how this applies to your life. Peel back the layers of all the things that make us different from one another and you’ll find that basically, we all want the same things. We want to be loved for who we are, know that we’re safe and we belong, be valued and appreciated for what we do and grow to our full potential. You may have a few personal variations to this list, but it’s pretty much the same for everyone as psychologist, Abraham Maslow pointed out in the ‘Hierarchy of Needs’.

Therefore, within the context of what most of us want and need, the concepts of ‘hunger’ and ‘fear’ often appear like this:

Hunger

The fundamental need to have what is essential for our physical survival: air, food, water, shelter, safety.
The deep need to be loved and feel loved, to be treated with dignity and respect.
The desire to have our efforts, opinions and feelings acknowledged, valued and appreciated.
The need to break free of the restrictions that are holding us back from being all that we are.
The desire to be a part of, and belong to, something greater than oneself and make a difference.

Fear

When we think of fear our immediate response may be to conjure up Hollywood movie images of terror, blind panic and dread. However, if we reframe fear to include not only those but also behaviors that are resistant and counter-productive to our personal growth, we will find that fear has many other faces.

Some examples of this broader concept of fear include; apathy, procrastination, blame, control, aggression, manipulation, lying, resignation, the ‘whatever’ attitude, letting things slide, choosing to remain invisible and avoidance, to name a few.

The seemingly endless roller coaster ride of wanting our needs met and fearing they won’t, can easily become the theme of our lives.

How do we get off this roller coaster ride? Be sure to come back and read my next blog for Part 3, the final installment of ‘Is Your Hunger Greater Than Your Fears.’

Is Your Hunger Greater Than Your Fear? Part 1

2009-12-05T15:41:00.000-08:00

Have you ever heard something, completely out of the blue, that changed how you see and experience the world? I did.

Last year I attended a show at a falconry center where I was able to see some incredibly beautiful eagles, hawks and owls. The presentation took place in a small amphitheater on the compound and an experienced trainer brought out a few birds one at a time and talked to us about them.

During a portion of the presentation the trainer had an eagle perched on his forearm and while speaking he would occasionally lift the bird to flight. The eagle would fly a substantial distance away, far enough that I had to visually strain to keep it in view, the trainer would then put some food in his hand and call the bird. Each time the eagle would swoop in at a ferocious speed that made the audience instinctively ‘duck’, land on the trainer’s arm and take the food.

Of course, we all ‘ooohed’ and ‘aahed’ at the magnificent sight, marveling at how well the eagle was trained and commenting on the special connection between the bird and its trainer, but the trainer was quick to point out that there’s nothing special about this. The eagle doesn’t come by it naturally to want to fly to a human being in fact, it’s instinct is to stay away.

So then, why did the eagle do this? Its physical hunger, we were told, its instinctual drive for food to ensure its survival, was greater than its fear based instinct to stay away in other words, its hunger was greater than its fear.

When I heard this, time seemed to stand still. In that instant I saw not only how this concept applied to the human experience but of greater significance, how in completely captured the pivotal point that determines our personal evolution or conversely our stagnation and decay.

Inherent in the experience of being a living, breathing human is the deeply held need to grow and evolve, an instinctual drive to thrive. But evolving, i.e. moving from where we are to where we need to be, is often easier said than done because it requires stepping out of our comfort zone.

Comfort Zones
Understanding comfort zones and our connection to them is important. Comfort zones serve a purpose in our lives in that being structured, predictable, providing safety, shelter and sustenance of various kinds, they create order out of what might otherwise be chaos. And that feels good. Based on the amount of time we spend in them, they also become very familiar places and for all these reasons combined, we draw comfort from them. But it doesn’t stop there and, if we’re going to be really honest we have to acknowledge that they also allow us to hide from ourselves and others, and avoid facing the things that trigger our fears.

When ‘opportunities for personal evolution’ (sometimes known as “crisis”) come knocking at the door signaling that we have outgrown the usefulness of a comfort zone, rationally we may be aware of the reasons why it is in our best interest to take the evolutionary step forward but emotionally we may find ourselves resistant. We know that our comfort zone is no longer the best place for us to be but the fact is, it’s familiar. What’s on the other side of this familiar territory is completely unknown and, as our panicked hearts insistently remind us, when we step into the uncertain waters of change we’re not in control and therefore at greater risk of failing.

Ah, the very thing we fear the most, Failing, and by the way, Failing doesn’t like to travel alone so with him you can be sure to find his close friends: Lost, Alone, Not Good Enough, Anxious, Overwhelmed, and Powerless.

So why, with so much at stake, would anyone knowingly put themselves in such a fearful and turbulent state?

Be sure to come back and read my next blog for Part 2 of ‘Is Your Hunger Greater Than Your Fears.’

Great Links to Help You Live an Empowered Life

Mental and Emotional Health
This link will give you some sound information on managing Seasonal Affective Disorders, otherwise known as the ‘winter blahs’.
http://www.essortment.com/all/whatseasonalaf_rgqe.htm

Panic Attacks
Here is a wonderful and informative site on Panic Attacks and other types of Anxiety.
http://www.anxietypanicattack.com/

www.kristinajansz.com

What Brings You Joy?

2009-11-28T09:24:00.001-08:00

Such a simple question, 4 little words, yet this question is the one that stumps most people, especially those who have become emotionally disconnected with themselves.
So let me ask you:

What does Joy mean to you? What brings you Joy?

What have you experienced that made/ makes your heart burst open to such an extent that you had no idea that you could feel such joy, love, and happiness? Is it an accomplishment, a piece of music, a sunset, the love and connection you feel with another, fulfilling a life long dream, a new awareness?

What makes you happy to be alive now, right now?

Take a moment, or a day or a week, but make sure you take the time to answer this question. This is so important because whatever you put your attention on will become your Reality. If all you’re seeing in your life are the things that are wrong with it, then that’s what will end up taking up the most space.

You see, thoughts have emotions attached to them and emotions create chemical reactions in your brain. Each time you think a thought that generates a strong emotion, powerful neurochemicals are released in your brain creating neural pathways. Each time you repeat this thought and feeling, the neural pathways gets more defined in much the same way as walking down a path, the more it is traveled the more defined the path becomes.

What all of this means is that you can literally create a happy / sad/ joyous/ negative / inspired brain. It’s completely up to you! You can chemically reconfigure your brain to be whatever kind of brain you want. Think about the impact this has on the quality of life you live.

Name 5 things that bring you Joy and then post your answers so that we can acknowledge it with you! If you can only name 1 thing, that’s fine too. www.kristinajansz.com

The Importance of Pausing

2009-11-22T12:28:00.000-08:00

Imagine reading a book in which there are no commas or periods. Page after page, all the words run together making it near impossible to decipher the intended meaning.

Imagine listening to a piece of music that doesn't have any rests in it. What you’d experience is a cacophony of meaningless noise.

Imagine getting into a car and driving it from point A to point B. At your start point you press the accelerator to the floor and, without stopping at stop signs or traffic lights, you don’t release your foot until you reach point B. This action will cause chaos and destruction to you and those around you.

The commas and periods in written word and the rests in music are what give context and meaning to these forms of expressions. Using the breaks while driving allows you to interact with others respectfully and safely on the road. All of these are examples of Pausing and they create order out of chaos.

In the same way, taking time out to Pause brings meaning to the energy you output in your life.

• Pausing and being fully present in the moment gives deeper meaning to your actions.
• Pausing before reacting to another greatly enhancing meaningful, respectful communication.
• Pausing and turning your attention inwards helps you re-center yourself so that you can hear your truth. It allows you to reconnect with your emotional center of gravity.

Pausing also allows you to press that internal reset button and reconnect with the place within where your mind, body, heart and soul meet. From this point of being centered you can then go out to meet your day, week, challenges.

Now, will it be possible for you to go from living at break-neck speed to being fully present in every single moment, right away? Probably not, however small steps repeated consistently over time generate extraordinary, long lasting change and that's something that is achievable!

So, take time out to Pause as often as you can during the course of a day. Right now it may only be for a few seconds at a time, and that's okay. Make it your goal to become fully present in the moment, for instance while sipping your morning coffee or sitting at a traffic light or speaking with your child. Be in this moment as if nothing else in the Universe exists but this moment.

Ask your senses to shake off their drowsiness and fully experience everything that is happening. Challenge yourself to discover beauty in each of these moments. Dare yourself to find something for which you are truly grateful. In doing so, you will greatly increase the value and meaning of each moment you're living and ultimately the quality of your life. www.kristinajansz.com

Letting Go

2009-11-15T03:37:00.000-08:00

Having to let go can trigger our deepest fears. The end of a relationship, death of a loved one, job loss, moving, life/age transitions, they're all a part of life but, oh my goodness, can they ever stir things up inside!

In fact, they can be so upsetting that we often want to hit the fast-forward button just to get through the whole tumultuous experience as quickly as possible. However, if we do this we often miss the great gift that lies within this time of transition and one that profoundly affects our future.

So, here's what I'd like to share with you about Letting Go.....

"How" you let someone or something go from your life is as important as the fact that they / it came into your life in the first place.

You can let go from a place of:

1. Fear: "Good Riddance! I didn't want to be there anyway, didn't want them in my life, I'm better off without them." or perhaps we are filled with such deep pain and sorrow that we lose our connection with life, the loss of our loved one makes our life some how less meaningful. This place of letting go is filled with fear-based emotions: anger, resentment, bitterness, hopelessness and despair.

Or

2. Love: "While it wasn't always easy, I'm grateful for having had this chance to learn what I needed to learn about myself and others. I am in this life to learn and someone was going to have to step up and teach me this 'dance' (the life's lesson) so if it wasn't them it would have been someone / something else. I'm grateful that they participated with me in learning this lesson and wish them the best." This place of letting go is filled with acknowledgment, gratitude and if not love, then definitely, respect.

Here's why choice number 2 is the better investment for your future. If you are consumed with anger, resentment, bitterness and despair when you let go, the toxic vibrations associated with these fear-based emotions fill you. Basically you ‘marinade’ in them and because whatever you put your attention on, becomes your Reality, these toxic emotional vibrations are the frequency you can expect to experience as your future. What this means is that even though the person or situation has left your immediate Present, the cycle of pain continues as a result of the fear-based thoughts and emotions you’re participating in and using to create your future and you're not free of it at all!

If, on the other hand, your choice is to let go from a place of Love, you are filled with the kind of emotional vibrations that will richly support you in creating a joyous, loving and abundant future and, as a result, you are truly free.

The choice is yours. www.kristinajansz.com

There’s More to Life than 'Going through the Motions'

2009-11-14T08:49:00.000-08:00

Your life is meant to be a dazzling expression of all that you are. There was a time when you knew this to be true. It was your truth! You committed to experiencing each moment with your entire being. Your heart was wide open, you believed everything was possible, you knew you could do anything and the radiance of this knowledge shone in your face and sparkled in your eyes. That was before you were told to be practical, reasonable, responsible, and "could you please get your head out of the clouds". And with that, you shut down and grew up.

Since then, you've been doing all the right things and taking well-charted roads. Each day you get up and conduct your life according to the conscious and subconscious guidelines laid out for you by parents, family and society. You do what's expected of you. You're a good person, responsible, reliable and reasonable.

So why, then, is there a voice deep inside you saying, "I can't do this anymore! I feel like I'm suffocating." To those on the outside, your life looks wonderful but inside, it feels empty, as if somehow you're living a lie. You don't feel a connection with the life you’ve worked so hard to create. Daily, you go through the motions but in your heart you know there's something fundamentally wrong. Your rational mind tells you to "snap out of it and be grateful for what you have" but your heart won't be silenced. You feel like you're going crazy.
Let me say here that no, you're not going crazy. Your internal, emotional "egg timer" has gone off and it's time to review the approach you've been taking to living your life. In other words, this is supposed to happen. I fondly refer to it as emotional puberty. It’s similar to physical puberty in that it is essential to your overall maturation process and it's going to happen whether you want it to or not. The difference however, is that unlike the physical version, emotional puberty doesn’t happen in your youth. It’s also important to note that once thought to be a 40’s ‘event’ and thus nicknamed the "mid-life crisis", more and more people are now hearing this call an earlier age.
The sound of the egg timer signals a time when some adjustments are necessary to get back on track with your truth. It does not mean you have to leave your family, relationship or job and you don't have to get a sports car, hairpiece, enhancements and a young date. It does, however, mean that the time has come to review the beliefs and behaviors with which you've been living your life:

• Are they yours or someone else's?

• Are they aligned with the truth of who you really are, as they were when your face shone and your eyes sparkled?

• Have you been making choices from a place of fear (of what your life will be if you do or don't do certain things ) or from a place of truth?

• When you get to the end of your life will you look back and say "Wow, I lived the most wonderful and fulfilling life!"

If your goal is to live a deeply fulfilling, joyous and inspired life then there are some things that have to happen now. To begin with, you cannot accept 'going through the motions' as a way of life. You need to become conscious of how and why you’re living each moment. Call up those emotions of agitation and discontent that have been troubling you and become clear about what you're feeling. To put it simply, Wake Up!

Once you do, you’ll probably find that some changes are required. The process of change can feel overwhelming at times, so much so that you may think your only choice is to do something drastic in order to break free from the stress. While it may seem as though this is the only solution, facing your feelings of discontent does not mean that you have to walk away from everyone and everything in your life. When you find areas that are off track, don't let it slide. Get focused, peel back the layers, figure out where the disconnect is between where you are and where you want to be and then make small, sustainable changes in the direction of your goal. Not only is this easier to achieve, it’s also less traumatic on those around you. If, like most people, you find that you’re too close to your issues to see the forest for the trees and you need help to gain some clarity, reach out and get it!

This may sound like a lot of work but really, it isn’t. In fact, this process is so incredibly freeing that most people wonder why they didn't "wake up" sooner. Your life is meant to be a dazzling expression of all that you are. You're not meant to go though it half-asleep, settling for less, shutting down and numbing your pain. You're supposed to go for it and so, when you do, you reconnect with the greater flow and consciousness of life of which we are all apart. This is a very powerful force. If you saw the movie 'Finding Nemo' you’ll remember the scene in which the turtles are plodding along in the ocean, moving very slowly and unenthusiastically. Suddenly they step into the East Australian Current and take off at great and effortless speed, whooping it up and having the time of their lives. Well, that’s what it’s like! It’s the difference between simply existing and truly living.

When you begin living your truth you will be filled with a renewed life force, the likes of which you probably thought you'd never experience again. You will live with a sense of joy, enthusiasm and vitality that you believed only belonged to childhood.

Start by listening to that little voice inside, the one that tells you something doesn't feel right. Don't brush it aside. It's your truth. It's that shining, dazzling aspect of you waking up and wanting to live.
www.kristinajansz.com

Building Confidence

2009-11-13T08:30:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed that just when you're considering stepping out of your safe zone to reach for that goal you've wanted so badly, you're filled with fear and resistance? What you really want is to be filled with Confidence.

Well, here's something you need to know about confidence.....

Confidence is developed as a RESULT of a process. The process begins with thinking things through clearly, doing all the necessary preparation, developing a strong support system, taking THE step, remaining focused on your goal, dealing with all the challenges that come up (some of which may be those you feared) and drawing on internal resources of strength and character you didn't know you possessed. Sometime later, you'll look back to the point where you originally began, probably be amazed at the steps you've taken and notice that you have gained Confidence in your ability.

Quite honestly, I think it's very beneficial to be filled with a certain amount of nervous excitement at the beginning (as opposed to being over-confident of lackadaisical) because it keeps you alert and aware of what's taking place which is the best place from which to make decisions. www.kristinajansz.com

Good Vibes: Creating the Reality YOU Desire

2009-11-12T14:34:00.000-08:00

I'm currently reading a book on String Theory.... Physics, which I have to admit I've had a passion for my whole life, not just physics mind you, anything that helps me understand how this whole thing called Life really works. But before you start thinking I'm a science-type, I need to tell you that the book is called "The Idiot's Guide to String Theory".

Anyway, what this book is teaching me and the point I want to make here is this: peel back all the layers of what things appear to be on the outside, and it all comes down to Vibration (...well, and then some, but that's for another time). Beliefs about yourself and others, behaviors, thoughts, feelings, relationships, things (car, table, apple)..... it's all vibration.

I know you've heard it before but today's the day you're going to hear it again: Change the vibration you have inside you on any given topic, and your Reality i.e. your association to it, changes.

How do you change your vibration?

1. Decide to feel differently
2. Deeply and powerfully Feel the emotions associated with the desired intention so that every cell in your body vibrates with the emotions (much the same way you feel when you fall in love)
3. Back it up with Behavior that is aligned with your goal. (Obviously, use some rational thought with this. Don't go spending a million dollars if you don't have it....as yet)

Do these three things Consistently with Intention and Precision and your Reality changes. Do you have any idea how much power you have, right now, to create the life you desire? Amazing!
http://www.kristinajansz.com/